"I can't stop thinking about it!" "You've gotta let it go!" "I can't!"
Mark and Lisa sat on the shoreline - staring out over the water.
It had been over an hour since they sat down and still they hadn't moved.
Fixated on some imaginary spot on the horizon not willing to even look at each other.
"You know?... I wonder... what would have happened if?"
"If what? You can't go back in time and change what happened- period end of sentence!"
"Mark, why do you have to be such a jerk?"
"I'm sorry - I don't mean to be a jerk - I just can't see how going over and over this - can help either one of us."
It was as if time had stood still.
Maybe they couldn't go back in time but this sure wasn't allowing them to move on either.
It had been nearly two years now - since they had lost their little girl. She was born perfect - all ten toes and fingers- every part whole and nothing missing. Candra had been the light of their life - filling their home with joy and happiness.
She was almost twelve when it happened. At first she began to lose her balance a little - then she began to forget things. Mark and Lisa were young parents. They didn't know much about themselves let alone how to look after a little one - yet intuitively they knew something was wrong - bad wrong. Lisa finally got enough courage to say it out loud. "Mark, do you see something different about Candra? - She doesn't seem herself." Mark sheepishly replied, "I didn't want to say anything - but now that you've mentioned it - she does seem a bit off her game." It wasn't long after that - that they took her to a specialist - where their concerns were confirmed. Looking back this was probably one of the darkest days of their lives.
Mark and Lisa met in high school. They were what you'd call "high school sweethearts". Their relationship wasn't picture perfect - they fought allot and broke up more times than you can count - somehow they stuck together and weathered the storms. Maybe it was practice - practice for a storm of such strength and magnitude that they would need every skill they learned during their wars - to keep this marriage together. The loss of Candra came at a time in Mark and Lisa's marriage that was - well you might say - less than perfect. Lets just say their eyes were not so focused on each other and let it go at that. They had both lived - looking for what (could have been) and were never quite satisfied with what they had. Better jobs, more money, better kids, and they even doubted if they should have ever gotten together.
Loosing Candra tore a hole in all that.
Had they had - just what they wanted - and missed it?
Now they needed each other more than any time in their entire lives.
A part of them was gone - a part of them that they had brought into the world
-
together.
As they sat there - - - they no longer fantasized. They didn't dream of better partners, places or things - they just held each other and waited for the ache to go away.
---
So many times we stare - fixated on some imaginary spot on the horizon.
We look over the fence at what could have been.
We dream of lovers that would bring us unheard of happiness - castles filled with treasures - where every day the sun shines -
You know the stuff that fairy tails are made of.
Why is that?
Have you ever found yourself saying the "if onlys"? "If only I had their money." If only I had his wife." If only I had her husband." "If only I had their kids." "If only I had them for parents!" (Car, job, health, you name it!)
Over they years I too have fallen into the "If onlys" trap. But what I have also seen is this...
-
Everyone has their "STUFF". By that I mean...
--
The grass may look greener on the other side but ask yourself - "Why is it greener?" If you look closer -- it is usually because it is well fertilized.
As soon as you start walking around in their "Green Grass" you step in their "Stuff".
God wants us to be content where we are. Not to punish us with what we don't have - but to wake us up to what we do have.
Hebrews 13:5 (KJV)
"Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee."
I like how the (Amplified Bible) translates it...
Hebrews 13:5
"Let your character or moral disposition be free from love of money [including greed, avarice, lust, and craving for earthly possessions] and be satisfied with your present [circumstances and with what you have];
for He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support.
[I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down ([relax My hold on you)!
[Assuredly not!]"
Don't get frozen in time!
Trust God and cherish what you have.
God wants us to be content not as a punishment but because he loves it when we find that place of peace.
He only wants good for us.
When we are discontent - we are the ones who loose.
Enjoy what you have...
you don't know how long you'll have it.
It had been nearly two years now - since they had lost their little girl. She was born perfect - all ten toes and fingers- every part whole and nothing missing. Candra had been the light of their life - filling their home with joy and happiness.
She was almost twelve when it happened. At first she began to lose her balance a little - then she began to forget things. Mark and Lisa were young parents. They didn't know much about themselves let alone how to look after a little one - yet intuitively they knew something was wrong - bad wrong. Lisa finally got enough courage to say it out loud. "Mark, do you see something different about Candra? - She doesn't seem herself." Mark sheepishly replied, "I didn't want to say anything - but now that you've mentioned it - she does seem a bit off her game." It wasn't long after that - that they took her to a specialist - where their concerns were confirmed. Looking back this was probably one of the darkest days of their lives.
Mark and Lisa met in high school. They were what you'd call "high school sweethearts". Their relationship wasn't picture perfect - they fought allot and broke up more times than you can count - somehow they stuck together and weathered the storms. Maybe it was practice - practice for a storm of such strength and magnitude that they would need every skill they learned during their wars - to keep this marriage together. The loss of Candra came at a time in Mark and Lisa's marriage that was - well you might say - less than perfect. Lets just say their eyes were not so focused on each other and let it go at that. They had both lived - looking for what (could have been) and were never quite satisfied with what they had. Better jobs, more money, better kids, and they even doubted if they should have ever gotten together.
Loosing Candra tore a hole in all that.
Had they had - just what they wanted - and missed it?
Now they needed each other more than any time in their entire lives.
A part of them was gone - a part of them that they had brought into the world
-
together.
As they sat there - - - they no longer fantasized. They didn't dream of better partners, places or things - they just held each other and waited for the ache to go away.
---
So many times we stare - fixated on some imaginary spot on the horizon.
We look over the fence at what could have been.
We dream of lovers that would bring us unheard of happiness - castles filled with treasures - where every day the sun shines -
You know the stuff that fairy tails are made of.
Why is that?
Have you ever found yourself saying the "if onlys"? "If only I had their money." If only I had his wife." If only I had her husband." "If only I had their kids." "If only I had them for parents!" (Car, job, health, you name it!)
Over they years I too have fallen into the "If onlys" trap. But what I have also seen is this...
-
Everyone has their "STUFF". By that I mean...
--
The grass may look greener on the other side but ask yourself - "Why is it greener?" If you look closer -- it is usually because it is well fertilized.
As soon as you start walking around in their "Green Grass" you step in their "Stuff".
God wants us to be content where we are. Not to punish us with what we don't have - but to wake us up to what we do have.
Hebrews 13:5 (KJV)
"Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee."
I like how the (Amplified Bible) translates it...
Hebrews 13:5
"Let your character or moral disposition be free from love of money [including greed, avarice, lust, and craving for earthly possessions] and be satisfied with your present [circumstances and with what you have];
for He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support.
[I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down ([relax My hold on you)!
[Assuredly not!]"
Don't get frozen in time!
Trust God and cherish what you have.
God wants us to be content not as a punishment but because he loves it when we find that place of peace.
He only wants good for us.
When we are discontent - we are the ones who loose.
Enjoy what you have...
you don't know how long you'll have it.
Written By & Submitted by: Ben Andrews
"To The King!"
"To The Kingdom!"
2 comments:
You are absolutely right about the fable of perfection. As I read your blog I am sitting on a mountain hillside and thinking about how beautiful, quite, and calm this place is. Yet, I am also thinking that I will have to leave it soon and return to the work-a-day world. We are not promised another breath, so instead of living on the worries of the future we should be living in the present.
Once when I was afraid my mom said, we are told that we can climb up on to shoulders of God and get a piggyback ride. That reminded me of going on volksmarches in Germany (10 k walks through the woods or scenic towns) with our tiny son, Gary, in a backpack on my back. Never once did Gary try to steer where we were going. Never once did he tell us he was afraid that I would lead him to some scary place. He just rode, sometimes slept, and didn't even give a thought to the fact that he trusted us. I would have done this his whole life, made all of the decisions for him, but he would not grow into the man he is today without us letting him "experience" life and the results of his choices (some good and some not so good). I see that I am not that different. When I trust God and climb up on his back I am peaceful. When I try to figure things out (try to manage all of the possible things that could go wrong) I am filled with fear. On car trips, of which we did many, Gary sat in the back seat in his car seat most of the time he was content to just ride, but often a little voice from the back seat would say "Mommy, hold my hand". My wife, Teresa, would quickly reach back and hold his little hand and peace seemed to flow from her hand to his. God, in His infinite wisdom, allows me free will to make my own choices, but he waits nearby listening for me to call out to him. "Daddy (Abba), hold my hand". When I ask he is always there, not because of who I am or what I have done, but because of who He is. Instantly, peace flows from His hand to me.
You are absolutely right about the fable of perfection. As I read your blog I am sitting on a mountain hillside and thinking about how beautiful, quite, and calm this place is. Yet, I am also thinking that I will have to leave it soon and return to the work-a-day world. We are not promised another breath, so instead of living on the worries of the future we should be living in the present.
Once when I was afraid my mom said, we are told that we can climb up on to shoulders of God and get a piggyback ride. That reminded me of going on volksmarches in Germany (10 k walks through the woods or scenic towns) with our tiny son, Gary, in a backpack on my back. Never once did Gary try to steer where we were going. Never once did he tell us he was afraid that I would lead him to some scary place. He just rode, sometimes slept, and didn't even give a thought to the fact that he trusted us. I would have done this his whole life, made all of the decisions for him, but he would not grow into the man he is today without us letting him "experience" life and the results of his choices (some good and some not so good). I see that I am not that different. When I trust God and climb up on his back I am peaceful. When I try to figure things out (try to manage all of the possible things that could go wrong) I am filled with fear. On car trips, of which we did many, Gary sat in the back seat in his car seat most of the time he was content to just ride, but often a little voice from the back seat would say "Mommy, hold my hand". My wife, Teresa, would quickly reach back and hold his little hand and peace seemed to flow from her hand to his. God, in His infinite wisdom, allows me free will to make my own choices, but he waits nearby listening for me to call out to him. "Daddy (Abba), hold my hand". When I ask he is always there, not because of who I am or what I have done, but because of who He is. Instantly, peace flows from His hand to me.
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